To Hug or Not to Hug

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business, business acumen, business etiquette, handshake, harassment, hugging, uncomfortable

Is hugging a normal part of your business day? It’s never been for me. Ever. I’m only a hugger with loved ones and close friends, and always keep it out of business. Yet recently I was in an office where associates of mine walked in and, as we greeted each other, I extended my hand for a handshake and they hugged me.

I was stupefied. The situation was particularly odd for a couple reasons:

1. I’m new to the business and in the initial phase of establishing work relationships;
2. I’ve been in meetings with these two associates before and we never hugged; and
3. There was another associate in the room (male) and they did not hug him.

Now, these men (and their hugs) were not offensive or harassing. They really did just seem friendly and happy to see me. Their actions took me by surprise because it is out of the realm of their normal business acumen – as I said we’d never hugged before or established that type of protocol.

I did not but should have said something at the time that hugging makes me uncomfortable, however it was truly one of those moments where the element of surprise overrides the preferred reaction. I was caught completely off-guard.

Since that occurrence, I’ve been in meetings with these same associates and there’s not been another hug proffered. I really do not know what preempted the initial contact, but will be ready in case the scenario occurs again: I will take a step back, extend my hand and let them know I prefer shake hands to hugging.

I know there are people and businesses who encourage or participate in a “hugging friendly” environment, but I am not and this is not one of those.

When have you accounted a situation where associates took too much of a familial tone (without harassment) and how did you respond?

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Another Year

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another, beginning, calendar, challenges, ending, failure, motivation, New Year, obstacles, participating, resolutions, situps, success

Unbelievable. We’re already one week into the new year. Another year. Another new semester. Another workweek.

Another Thursday.

Another blog post.

Another another.

Sheesh.

I remember when the turning of the calendar was supposed to be a great motivator to get things moving. A 12-month possibility that’s led by the resolutions. Promises to do something. Promises to change something. Promises promises. Unfortunately, before we’re even able to articulate fully our goal, we’re bombarded by the statistics of how many of us are expected to break our resolutions before the end of the week. We don’t even get a month anymore! Seems harsh, doesn’t it, that people expect us to fail before we even begin?

In planning change, it’s about setting realistic expectations and acknowledging or celebrating achievements along the way. And by doing it your way.

A friend of mine began a new work out program this week. She admitted the push ups are the biggest challenge as she’s coming off a rotator cuff injury, and doesn’t think she can do them. At least not the 20 expected on the first day. We discussed her reality and agreed she should do one. One push up each day. She knows her shoulder can handle that. Then next week, as the muscles strengthen move up to two. And maybe three the week after that. There’s no reason she has to do 20 today, especially if her body can’t handle it. But one she can do. And next week maybe two. And when she does two, I’ll congratulate her.

Setting goals, sticking to them and staying motivated are no easy tasks. There’s always another obstacle to overcome, but I think it’s healthy to acknowledge the goals we do meet on our way to completing a challenge. I’m not saying everyone should get a trophy just for participating, but do be proud of putting yourself out there. Rather than focus on a failure, focus on the great feeling of actually doing something so you can move on to another success.

That’s right. Another success. That’s one another I don’t mind repeating.

 

All Signs Point To Yes

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2016, best, happy new year, Magic 8 Ball, New York Times Best Selling Author, year

All the best to you for a successful and happy 2016.

I agree with the Magic 8 Ball: ALL SIGNS POINT TO YES for each of us to create the best year ever.